you left evidence


don’t be fooled by the smiley: this is the kind of note that really throws you off balance. (it’s been more than a month since she received this note, and kiki from boston says she’s still shaking in her boots a little.)

21 responses to “you left evidence

  1. I have totally received a note like this before from a roommate and her name was Erin. I love how that last sentence tries to sugarcoat the sneak attack of the first part of the note. Oh and of course there’s the ever-present overly-used smiley. Sometimes I like using those at work in an email, like:

    Dear Boss,

    I seem to have quite a bit on my plate this week; however, it really is a great opportunity for me to increase productivity. That said, I will be unable to do items 25 thru 74, just so you know, because I’m, like, you know, one person.



    lol. Love this blog btw!

  2. kiki needs to buy her own food. fuck off, kiki. :)

  3. Where can I buy tee-shirts with these images on them?

    Do you have any merchandise?

  4. i never care if roomates eat my food in moderation. everybody gets hungry, why be so anal about it? like jerri blank says – “it’s like a commune. take what ya need, leave what ya have.”

  5. love this blog!

    i wonder what kind of “evidence” one could leave behind… crumbs, a dirty spoon? what?

  6. What did she eat? The handwriting isn’t clear.

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  9. In 2001, I solved a “disappearing food” problem without these little notes. For some time (3 weeks or so), I bough some very nice food, put my name on it with a “do not touch — not for human consumption!” sign, and watched it disappear. I also found out about the fine taste of the thief – sugar was high in the rank. So on a random day, I placed a box of very nice sugar treats with the same sign, in the same place, and — as expected — it disappeared pretty soon. That was 9-10AM. By 2PM, the horse laxative I put in the food made two co-workers abandon the office in a hurry, only to spend the next 24 to 48 hours in the hospital.
    Nothing was ever said (it could lead to lawsuit). If needed, I would claim the treats where for my horses, and “not for human consumption” — notice a similarity? I immediately stopped eating the food I left behind, just in case they thought of doing the same. Somehow, food never disappeared again.
    Next time I would use ink — permanent ink — just in case the idiots choose the lawsuit option.

  10. Pingback: commenter confessions: dealing with office thieves « passive-aggressive notes from roommates, neighbors, coworkers and strangers

  11. Has anyone realized that sometimes the only way you can communicate with your room-mate is by leaving a note. All my room-mates keep very different schedules and I am not going to wait around the house just to talk to them. I will however willingly take pictures of my notes and post them, if you would like.

  12. You know I have this same problem with my room mate. If it isn’t ketchup or mayo (to me isn’t a big deal) he will actually take the food right off my plate. The other night I was eating, and he came in to gab. He then started eating the chicken right off my plate. I asked him WTF… and he said… oh don’t worry I will make you some more. So now I guard my food like I’m a prison inmate.

  13. Did anybody notice we’re talking about margarine here?

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  15. Pingback: commenter confessions: dealing with office thieves | — funny (if not necessarily "passive-aggressive") notes from pissed-off people

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